I have officially
adjusted my vocabulary to the past tense. Living abroad is different from
backpacking, in that you give yourself time to settle somewhere. My
status quickly shifted from teaching fellow to nomad. Now I sit in a hostel in
Bogotá on my last full day in Colombia. Time has gone by so fast that I barely
noticed the changes in me. Physically looking in the mirror, I can see the
metamorphosis Colombia has made over the past four months. My skin's a little
darker, hair a little lighter, and body a little thicker.
In Barranquilla, my identity of
"home" was temporarily identified with a mother, an aunt, and a
traditional older brother in the north end of the city. In just less than 24
hours, that will adjust again, and it won't be the final time this week. I have
grown to appreciate small talk in the kitchen, and showing my host family
photos from my travels and previous life I originally left behind in the
States. But old will become new again, and new will become old.
On my last day, I
ponder how my life is about to make a drastic transition all over again.
But this time I don't have any doubts. When reflecting on my mentality, I've
discovered that my mind has opened more to the world than in previous travels.
I feel stronger, wiser, and more appreciative of the opportunities I've been
given. Last year, I faced a blur of confusion and uncertainty for my future. My
confidence in life choices was hindered, and I surely didn’t believe I would
gain it back in such a short amount of time. My vision went from thinking 5
years down the road, to thinking about what I was going to do with myself now. Altering my focal point helped me see
the things that would have surpassed me and my future.
It's so ironic to me how much I've actually
changed. Happiness, carelessness, and freedom feel so new yet natural at the
same time. In adjusting to life in Colombia, I noticed how easy it was to give
up old habits and things I've grown so comfortable having around me. There
was never a point in questioning decisions or concerns, especially those of
other people. All that matters is that I was able to turn all negative
situations into positives ones through choice in perspective.
These changes in me
didn't begin abroad, I only carried and strengthened them here. The seeds of
these values were planted by the love and support of an amazing family and true
friends who refused to let me dwindle. Their strength is what encouraged me to
regain mine back, in order to become the woman I am today. I utilized this
confidence to take my self exploration abroad. My inner goals were to discover
what type of person I want to be, and if I could handle it. Now that I know my
answer, I am ready to embody that woman.
Every memory I've
made has tattooed itself to my brain, allowing me to make wiser decisions with
each future step. I am a globetrotter. Someone who takes into consideration all the
things I've been exposed to abroad and even in my home country. Tomorrow my
adventure continues back in the USA. But who knows where I will really end up.
Keeping my curiosity alive is part of the thrill. As Robert Frost reflected, no
one knows what’s down the path not taken until someone breaks the norm.
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